Five

Dear Eli,

Today you turn five years old, and my brain can't even comprehend how quickly the time has gone.  Everyone always tells you when you have an infant that "time flies," but I don't think I quite believed them.  And yet here I am with a five year-old boy, preparing for kindergarden and seeing your independence, and my heart just aches.

It's a good kind of ache.  It's a nostalgic and deeply thankful sort of ache that brings tears to my eyes as I look at you.  Because when I see you I see the tiny baby born so early and so sick.  I see the toddler who cried so hard he threw up every time I dropped him off at Sunday School.  I see the preschooler who independently learned colors, numbers, letters, shapes.  And I see this too-wonderful-for-words little boy who is so very ready to enter a new phase of life- school, boyhood, independence...  This is a gift to parents, I think- a gift that allows us to see a glimpse of God our Father.  We see who you were, and we see who you are now, and we dream of who you will be.  I ache for the past and yet look forward with so much expectation to the future. 

Eli, you are a joy.  There is really just no other way to put it!  You contibute happiness, help, humor, and compassion to just about every situation.  You care about those who hurt, selflessly lay aside your own interests when someone needs you, and are quick to give a hug or a present to anyone you are concerned about.  You are goofy and funny, always good for a laugh, easy to joke around with, so fun to talk to.  You're insightful and sensitive, but you don't dwell on your emotions, either. You are quick to forgive. 

You love sports with your whole heart, and you seem to be pretty good at them, too.  You love bugs of all kinds and would never kill even an ant.  You find snakes and lizards and so carefully put them back "with their families."  You ride your bike like a pro and are working diligently to learn how to skateboard.  Being outside is your favorite thing in the world, and you and Timothy spend hours working together on whatever project you dream up for the day.  You love to camp and fish, to hike and walk and run.  We love that our interests seem to be yours as well- we just love being together.

You are a hard worker and a perfectionist, which of course carries its positives and negatives.  You apply yourself whole-heartedly to tasks that are important to you, and I can't wait to see how much you thrive in kindergarten. 

You love Jesus, Eli.  You trust in God and talk to Him so often.  You want what He wants, and we love seeing the work of God in your heart already.  We pray fervently that there will be not even one day in your life when you stray away from Him.  May you always hear and follow His voice, valuing Christ above all else.

You have no idea how much I love you, Baby, though I try to tell you a hundred times a day in a hundred different ways.  I celebrate you today with my whole heart, praising God for giving me the beautiful privilege of being your mom. 

Happy, happy birthday, sweet boy.  I love you forever.

-Mommy.